JUST AS I AM
By Kristina Bubar

** Kristina has been nominated for female vocalist of the year by the Shai Awards. Vote for her and your other favorite Canadian artists today:
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Like a divine magnet, Just as I Am has pulled scores of people out of their seats and to their knees at the altar. It is a mystery how this hymn, sung slowly in the background by a massed choir, could evoke spiritual awakenings from within the listeners every time it was conducted by Reverend Billy Graham and Cliff Barrows.

Although we might associate this hymn with some great men, it was a great woman who wrote the words! Charlotte Elliot was 30 years old when her health began to quickly deteriorate. That’s as old as I am! I can’t imagine being confined to my bed for the rest of my life, especially when I feel like the adventure is just beginning. Up until then she was having the time of her life. She was a comic writer and becoming popular as a portrait artist. No wonder she became depressed. 

When Charlotte Elliot was 33, a Swiss evangelist visited her at her home in England, and basically told her, “You must come just as you are, a sinner, to the Lamb of God that taketh away the sin of the world.” Well, she did, and 12 years later she drew from those words for Just as I Am. She wrote the song to help raise funds for a school for poor pastors’ daughters that her pastor brother was trying to build. Her song raised more money than all the other fundraising projects combined.

Like so many great works, Just as I Am was born out of pain and anguish. I imagine Charlotte Elliot feeling like she had so little to offer, having lost the abilities and opportunities she used to have. She was stripped down to the bareness of what was left, her soul. Yet she was brave enough to come Jesus to save her.

That, I think, is why Charlotte Elliot’s hymn has transcended time and space. It is a song for every time we find ourselves at the end of our rope, which for me is often! It's a song for when we are confronted with the reality of who we really are without the externals of what we do.

I love the words in verse three where it says, “Just as I am, though tossed about with many a conflict, many a doubt, fightings and fears within, without, O Lamb of God I come! I come!" What a relief it is to know, He’ll take me. Even when I’m scared that no one else will, Jesus will take me with all my anxieties and selfish desires. Jesus receives us every time, as Charlotte Elliot says, He will “welcome, pardon, cleanse and relieve…” Talk about unconditional love! So why is it still so hard to come to Him, even though He’s never rejected us before? I know for myself, that most of the time, it’s because I’m so ashamed and so afraid that He won't take me back. Yet Jesus promises never to reject us when He said in John 6:37 “…whoever comes to me I will never drive away.” His invitation still stands, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.”

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About the Author

Kristina lives in Phoenix, Arizona with her husband and two young sons. She is a recording artist with a passion for worship. Currently, she's working on a companion book to her Hymns album, which illuminates the female hymn writers. To listen to her songs, visit http://www.kristinamusic.com. To e-mail Kristina, click here: mailto:editor@christianwomentoday.com?subject=Attn.Kristina_Bubar